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Dating - Dating After 40: Why Men Go "Poof" Vanish. Disappear. Do a David Copperfield. I've pondered the a lot, as it is happened often. I've interviewed men friends. The following is what I've gleaned. If you don't hear from a guy after 1 date, it is clear he's not interested. absolutely no problem, even though it is classier to send a nice email stating such. But what if you've gone out 2, 3 or more times? You seem to enjoy each others' company. You have fun. Laugh. Good conversation. Some hand holding. Maybe some kissing. Maybe more. Then poof. He's gone. Without a word. Here are my theories on why he disappears. He goes poof without so much as a particular I'm not feeling it, I thought we were a match, but now I don't think so, I'm looking for casual dating including it seems you need more, We need different things, so I don't think we should continue seeing each other, I've decided to focus on someone else (or obtain back with my ex), You're a wonderful woman, but I'm not feeling chemistry, or I just wanted a booty call. * He does not need to hurt your feelings, including does not know how to say (in person, phone or writing) any pertaining to the above. So he thinks it is best to stop contact including hope you will obtain the message. * He does not need any drama. He's had experience -- or heard stories -- of otherwise reasonable women going ballistic at the time a guy cuts her loose. Lots of yelling, crying, blaming, name calling, insulting his manhood or ancestors, perhaps throwing items -- at him, down stairwells, out windows. * He does not feel connected enough to you to feel he owes you any explanation. * the is his pattern including it is worked for him in the past, so he sees absolutely no reason to actually communicate with a woman he's been seeing including now decides to drop. * He does not like something fundamental regarding you (your shape, kiss, laugh, personality) including he's afraid if he tells you he's moving on, you will ask why. He does not need to have to tell you are a bad kisser/lover, have bad breath/BO, don't dress sexily, aren't smart enough, are too smart, etc. So to avoid a particular uncomfortable conversation, he disappears. * He does not feel he might satisfy you sexually. 1 man told me that if there have been a few attempts including a man hasn't satisfied the woman he could leave, as he feels it reflects on him. So rather than face the possibility that he is a bad lover, or be humiliated if she tells him or tries to suggest changes, he'll leave. * He does not think you might satisfy him sexually. He has ED including wants you to put everything back the way it used to be. at the time he can not perform, you are history. He thinks there must be a sexy woman out there who might obtain it working again. * He does not think he might make you happy. You have (or desire) a champagne lifestyle including he has a beer-budget job. He knows he can not give you what you need or expect, so disappears into the night. * He prefers other priorities/activities (work, sports, kicking with the guys) to hanging out with you. * He's involved with someone else. He's auditioning you for spare gal (for at the time his alpha woman is not available) or to replace his current one. He decides he's happier with his current squeeze. How will he possibly say that to you? I'm sure women must vanish for similar reasons, but since I don't date women, I don't know.
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